Why is WINNING a dirty word?

Saturday brought with it opening day of the Fall soccer season for my 5 year old. This season looked promising. At the one practice held prior to the season my son looked pretty good, drawing a post practice comment from the coach and leaving me wondering if he shouldn't have moved up an age level, since he is pushing six.

Game day was a disaster. Instead of my "6" year old dominating the younger competition, he stood, playing defense, or rather playing with his shirt tail and staring in our direction after any feeble attempt at getting involved in play. Thankfully the quarter ended and he came over for a drink. At this point I'm sure some of the surrounding mothers, his own included, thought I was the over zealous "sports dad". Believe what you will, but when it comes to my kids, I've learned to keep my competitiveness in check. I know my son, and a little tough love and old school coaching was in order. After I made sure he was good and mad, he headed back onto the field only to be sent right back to the sideline, he was sitting out the second quarter.

As I said before, believe what you will, but I'm not "sports dad", so after allowing him to "stew" a bit on the sideline, I went over and sat down beside him. I talked about how and why he needed to play to his potential and do his best, to which he responded, "It doesn't matter it's not a game...I mean it's a game, but nobody's keeping score."

I'll tell you how the game ended in a moment, but first I need to vent. What are we teaching our kids with these "don't keep score, everyone's a winner, self esteem, group hug, feel good about yourself" leagues? My son wasn't having his self esteem boosted, he saw no reason to play his best because it didn't matter. He was willing to coast through the game, with no idea of what he should be trying to accomplish or even why he should be trying to score a goal.

Part of developing our children should include developing their character. How does my son learn to be a "good winner" if he is not allowed to win? How does he learn to be a "good loser" if he never has to suffer defeat? I grew up in an era when every game, even the earliest Tee Ball games, resulted in a winner and a loser. I never felt poorly about myself because I lost a game, but instead learned to hate the feeling and strive to avoid it. Through losing, I learned the joy of winning, and the winning was something I wanted to have again and again. At ten years old I had a little league football coach who now seems to have been the embodiment of Mick, Rocky Balboa's manager. While his language may have left something to be desired, he had a desire to see us succeed. He got me, a 49 pound ten year old, to go head to head with 100+ pound 12 year olds. Yes, they were bigger than I was, but I held my own, because that was what was expected. You got knocked down. You got up again.

I've lived a blessed life with only a few bumps along the way, but like everyone, I've faced my challenges. Each time I find myself wanting to give in, I can't, I don't want to lose. The desire to be a winner has gotten me through troubled relationships, poor life decisions, and is a necessitate to survive in my chosen profession. The drive I learned on the courts and fields has been proven time after time. Let's teach our kids to be winners!

My son went back out and played goalie in the third quarter. He did the best I've ever seen him do. He missed one ball, giving up a goal which put the other team up 1-0. The fourth quarter found him playing offense. He scored 2 goals, moving the ball up the field like I knew he was capable of and the game ended with his team winning 2-1. On the way home I asked him whether it felt better to stand back and do nothing, or to score goals? He liked scoring the goals. He became excited when we informed him that we were keeping score, that his team had won, and that his two goals had won the game for them. I won't lie, it's a feeling I hope he enjoyed and one he wants to feel again. There is no shame in losing a well fought contest, but there is nothing that compares with a hard fought victory!

"After the boys of Summer have gone..."

This was/is one of my favorite songs, but it always evokes thoughts of a time of year I've never liked. The end of Summer. The arrival of Fall.

Even when new school years held excitement and anticipation and the arrival of Fall put me one step closer to hunting season, the shorter days left me longing for more time, more Summer. This feeling came knocking the other night as I drove back from Nashville. Passing Slugger Field, it's lights off, seats empty until "there's new grass on the field..." (another favorite tune), my mind began to churn. What had I not done this summer? Man, another summer with more time spent traveling and not with my kids. Why hadn't I... fill in the blank..?

As I crossed the bridge into Indiana, mixed in with these thoughts was, "Would I be saying the same thing if Christ returned today?" "Are there family members and friends I'll regret not sharing the Gospel with?" "Will I wish there was one more day?"

The neat part of my job is the places I've been and the things I've seen. The pain is that only once have I been able to share them with my wife and kids. I'm left thinking I need to do more to make sure I don't have that same feeling when God calls his people home. I need to take the time and share my faith. If nothing else, to make sure they know what gives me hope and who sees me through the hard times.

Proverbs 20:4 (New International Version)

4 A sluggard does not plow in season;

so at harvest time he looks but finds nothing.

Just to Write Something

It is getting late here in Nashville, but I just had to write something to get my blogging fix.

In the most recent issue of Runner's World magazine there is an article about running sprints uphill to build leg strength.

I tried this today on the treadmill, with a bit of a twist. After a warm up mile, rather than full out sprints for 10 seconds, I held a sub 5K pace for 30 second intervals, on a 6 degree incline. This makes it easier to adjust the speed and incline up and down, then recover at a moderate pace and .5 incline until recovered. Repeat. Then a 1/2 mile cool down.

Anyway, it made a three mile run go quickly and broke up the monotony of running on the treadmill. Give it a try next time you get bored on the treadmill.

SICR Dominates Utica 5K

Ok, that might be overstating the situation a bit, but we all did take home hardware.

• Tammy - 3rd Place Overall Female
• Alicia - 1st Place, Age Division
• Jina - 1st Place, Age Division
• Chris - 1st Place, Age Division
• James - 3rd Place Overall Male

As always, a great time!